In four short, (loooonnnnggg) days I pile my luggage, laptop and dad into the car and we drive across the country to St. Louis, Missouri for the ACFW conference.
I'm giddy with excitement.
And anxious with nerves.
What if they don't like me?
The agent laughs at my writing?
I go blank when someone wants to know what my story is about?
Monkeys take over planet Hollywood. No...what...wait, what is my story idea again??
Did I pack enough breath mints? Deodorant? One sheets? My roommate survival cheat sheet?
My story idea sucks. My business card font is waaaay too small and no agent/editor is going to give a hill o' beans to what I'm writing or care enough to dig out their magnifying scope to read my contact info.
At one time or another these ideas have run through my head as I prepared for the conference. But I know you don't have to be attending to know what I am talking about. Because at some point in our writing lives (in life period it seems) we have these doubting behaviors. Those times when all we want to do is give completely up.
It can be so discouraging to watch the changing shifts in the market and know that our 'monkies hit planet Hollywood and crash on the set of Grey's Anatomy' is not going to be bought anytime soon.
Is it worth it to keep going?
Since you can't attend the conference and won't get to meet with all these fab authors/agents/editors is it really worth continuing to write right now? Maybe you should just wait for the muse to come back.
Wrong. That is the last thing you should do.
As humans, but more importantly, as creations of the Father, we are unique and important in His sight. We each bring something to the table of His kingdom. It doesn't matter how long you spend on those manuscripts or how much they aren't 'saleable' in the world's eyes. They are perfect for you right now.
No one can write the story you are writing like you can. No one else had that exact story idea. You were the one to dream up the characters, give them a plot and put them to life on the page.
You spend hours breathing life and editing them into submission and no one else could come up with the exact same string of words like you could.
Don't listen to what the world is telling you should or should not be writing. Or going. Or doing. Fads change like the winds, but because we are anchored to Christ, grounded in what we know we should be doing for Him, we are in the perfect place.
Listen to the voices of reason God has placed around you, sure. Absolutely, don't ignore their common sense, but also, don't forget that you wouldn't be here unless HE put you here.
I'll see you on the other side of the conference!